The Biggest Downside To Buying Toilet Paper From Trader Joe's

From the colored toilet paper rage to sustainable bamboo, loo paper has taken on a personality of its own. Trader Joe's has also produced an eco-friendly toilet paper that may not be worth the waste. While the sentiment of saving the planet is noble, some find that Trader Joe's Bath Tissue is simply not meeting their expectations. Notably, the rolls may be too much for the sensitive skin of our delicate derrieres, and they do not absorb as much as their counterparts.

On the other side, Trader Joe's Bath Tissue was highly ranked by the Natural Resources Defense Council (NRDC), scoring an impressive A+ grade, in their annual tissue scorecard. According to the environmental advocacy group, the grade is awarded to goods produced without chlorine bleaching, which are wholly composed of reclaimed materials. Considering that toilet paper production accounts for about 15% of deforestation in the United States, reclaimed products are important for protecting our forests. NRDC's Shelley Vineyard told The Washington Post, "This is just an incredibly important ecosystem that's literally being flushed down the toilet." It seems Trader Joe's would then be a good choice, right? However, many have voiced their disdain about the quality of the tissue on a basic level.

One social media user reviewed Trader Joe's tissue and swiftly got to the bottom of their offering. In a TikTok video, user @mattlipari questioned, "Where do you make these tissues? Is it the sandpaper factory?" Another Reddit user stated, "It's rough and the 'soft' one is nowhere near even generic blue Charmin." As one Amazon customer put it, "Not soft in the least bit." It seems as if many people felt that the loo rolls were just not gentle enough on their buttocks. 

Interestingly, the roughness of some rougher toilet tissue has been an issue for at least one culture, for many years. The Brits, in particular, were initially distrustful of the predominant rough type of toilet paper, citing that it was unreliable and unhygienic, until the 1970s when young couples and women started using "soft paper." Now, it seems as if the softer texture is a prerequisite for the loo roll even to be deemed acceptable.

In case you were wondering, at least one anal surgeon is an advocate for a softer wiping experience. Dr. Evan Goldstein told Well + Good that thin and rough tissue should be avoided. "It should really be soft enough to not irritate or tear up your behind," he said. It seems as if the medic believes that your toilet, and not your posterior, should be the only thing that's flushed by the time you're done. 

Trader Joe's Bathroom Tissue may not be the softest brand, but it also comes up short in the absorbency tests. Other tests were conducted comparing some well-known recycled toilet paper brands. They found that not only did it have the roughest texture, but the tissue absorbed the least when it was compared to its peers. Associate research professor Burak Aksoy, of the College of Forestry, Wildlife, and Environment at Auburn University, told The Washington Post that in recycled paper, the fibers are more rigid and therefore less absorbent and harder than their virgin fiber counterparts. 

Offering a medical opinion, Dr. Stephanie Hack, creator of the Lady Parts Podcast, told Livestrong that it was imperative to choose a soft, absorbent tissue. "A high-quality toilet tissue will be soft, absorbent, and gentle on the skin, while a lower-quality brand may leave you feeling rough and irritated."

The bottom line is that toilet paper is about as personal as it gets, and choosing between your skin's comfort and global warming may just cut a little too close to home. Of course, a cheaper and softer alternative might be to get that bidet installed in your bathroom for an extra clean experience.